She Touches Herself
Secrets of Female Masturbation
By Leanne Beattie
Everyone knows that most men masturbate like there’s no tomorrow, but women don’t have the same needs, do they? Don’t kid yourself. Statistics show that 60% of women admit to masturbating, although these numbers are probably even higher than that in reality. No doubt about it—your girlfriend is going solo more than you think.
Before you get defensive and try to convince yourself that your woman doesn’t need to masturbate because she’s got you in the picture, think again. You know you’re doing it, so why wouldn’t she be doing it too? You’d be mistaken if you thought that having orgasms is biologically optional for women, since it’s not necessary to reach orgasm in order to get pregnant. Your girlfriend is looking for a lot more sex than you realize, she just doesn’t want the mess and the hassle of hooking up with you all the time.
There are many reasons why women masturbate. If a woman has just left a relationship and refuses to sleep with just anyone, she’ll resort to “playing solitaire”. She doesn’t feel the need to look for the next Mr. Right just to get to her next orgasm.
Some women might masturbate because they’re feeling too insecure to be with a man. If she thinks that she’s overweight or unattractive, a woman won’t risk potential rejection by a sexual partner, hence the solo sex again.
And the horniest of women get excited so easily that they need to orgasm as often as possible. If you’re not around, she’ll take matters into her own hands to get the job done. This kind of woman knows exactly what to do to get herself off in record time, no man required.
Although it’s hard to admit, maybe you’re not holding up your end of the sexual bargain when it comes to her satisfaction and she’s got to finish the job herself. It’s sad but true that some guys just don’t take the time to bring their partners to orgasm. Or maybe she just can’t let herself go in front of you, for whatever reason, so she has to satisfy herself in private.
For most women, learning to orgasm takes effort and dedication—it doesn’t come naturally. British research has shown that it takes a woman two years to become orgasmic, once she begins having sex. A lot of teenaged girls learn to climax on their own, before they ever touch a guy, but the ability to orgasm with a partner has to be learned over time.
To be honest, there are some women who just aren’t able to orgasm any other way except through masturbation. These women know all the right buttons to push, so they stick to pleasuring themselves in order to get the orgasm they want.
There are several ways a woman can satisfy herself. Lots of women need only an active fantasy life and their own two hands to make the fireworks explode. Others rely on penis-shaped household items like hairbrush handles and the mighty cucumber to do the job for them, although these can sometimes be unsafe and unhygienic.
Remember that most women need direct stimulation of the clitoris in order to orgasm. This is the part of them that would have turned into a penis had they developed into males—and it’s just as important sexually to them as a penis is to a guy.
Anything that vibrates, like a personal massager, a washing machine on the spin cycle or a pager, can be used to reach orgasm. A hand-held shower head is also a popular way to beat around the bush and get clean and fresh at the same time. Some women like to lie on their back and touch themselves, while others prefer to orgasm by pressing their thighs tightly together and squeezing repeatedly.
However, many women need the prolonged clitoral stimulation that only a vibrator can provide in order to orgasm. The most common method is to caress the clitoris to orgasm with the vibrator—vaginal penetration is not usually needed at all, although some women enjoy the feeling of fullness and will use an object or dildo inside, as well as the vibrator on her clitoris.
Practically any woman can have an orgasm on her own if she stimulates herself long enough. Many women are multi-orgasmic if they use a vibrator, since the sensations produced by a vibrator are always consistent.
There are thousands of vibrators on the market but the intensity of the vibrations produced will depend on what type of vibrator is used. Electric plug-in types usually create the most intense sensations, while battery powered types are more subtle.
In general, vibrators are not used for vaginal penetration. If you thought they were, you might have them confused with dildos. Some vibrators are shaped to look like a penis, but the most popular styles don’t resemble the human body at all. On the other hand, dildos are often shaped realistically and usually don’t vibrate.
Vibrators are very helpful to women who can’t reach orgasm manually or through sex with a partner. Many women need constant, prolonged clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm and the steady intense vibrations produced by a vibrator can make a woman orgasm much more quickly than she ever would with a man.
If your girlfriend has a vibrator, don’t be intimidated—it can make your sexual relationship even better. Try having her press it against her clitoris during intercourse—you’ll be able to feel the vibrations too and she’ll have an exploding orgasm that’ll make both of you happy.
If you know that your girlfriend masturbates, get her to demonstrate to you how she touches herself and pay attention! Besides being a major turn-on for you, you’ll get to see exactly what turns her on and then duplicate it. Instead of being boring, this will be one lesson you’ll want to repeat over and over again.